pressing toward the mark..

I managed to get my Psychology homework done today at the eleventh hour - literally. One hour before my noon Psychology class, I finished up my source of frusteration; a study guide of questions that required essay-type answers. Or perhaps, I just write too much.

Perhaps this weekend was one of bad news; however, my missing out on the Packer game seems like a rather shallow thing to gripe about. And besides, I've just been reminded to keep a cheerful outlook on the situation.

I've just finished reading another blog - from a guy named Georges, who's from Brazil, studying in the States right now. His fiancee' of nine months broke off their engagement, yet he has an incredibly positive attitude about the whole thing. Of course he's not happy, but he's not angry and bitter and wallowing in self-pity. Me... I've been working on the whole positive attitude thing; for me, feeling sorry for myself is tempting and facing the prospect of the uncertainity ahead sometimes scares me, especially when I forget to focus.

Focus on what? Well, my faith, and God; my Faith teaches that all things work together for good (though we may not see it right now). God doesn't make bad things happen to us. We aren't puppets; in order to prevent people from getting hurt (all the time), God would have to move everyone around on invisible puppet strings, to keep us from going there, or keep someone from coming after us, or stop that dog from biting someone, etc.

Okay, so being Pinocchio is no picnic, but why do we get hurt? Why do bad things happen? Unfortunately, people choose to hurt us sometimes, because we are free to choose our own destiny. No one is forcing us to be good, or to love, or to be kind. Thus, the people that hurt us are not forced into kindness either. But what about other things that happen - like fires, natural disasters, plaugues, floods, etc.? I don't know why those things happen. But I do know this: God cares about all of us, and he is there. If we trust him enough, he will take even a horrible situation (that we think is hopless) and make something good happen out of it.

I know this; it's remembering when things get tough that is the real challenge. Every time in the past, things have worked out; things have been okay. So, its not a blind faith, and I'm not believing in a fairy tale, or something that's never gonna happen; something good will happen, out of all of this - I just have yet to see it.

My brother is living proof. My brother had been in trouble with the law for more than half of his life. He ran away from home (we thought for good) at 16 and we never heard from him again until he was arrested. He'd been in and out of prison for the next 15 or so years for varous things; mostly thefts and assualts and even armed robbery. He was a very angry and violent person. Sometimes he really scared me; but I was more scared about what he would do to himself. I was afraid one day he would get himself killed. The last time he was arrested, he almost did die; he'd stolen a truck and, while fleeing the cops, plowed into a utility pole. How he survived, no one knows.

But then, he got sick of all the running, all the time he tried to get it right and failed and he finally turned to the one thing he thought would never work for him - God. And his life has changed. He's on track, he's stopped the drugs, he's out of prison now and he has a job. He's involved in the lives of his kids, and he's got a positive life-view - something he didn't have before. You know, I never gave up hope for my brother. Ever since I was a little girl, I prayed that God would keep him safe and that he would change. So yes, I believe that faith does make a difference and God can make things work, even if it looks completely hopeless.

I don't even know Georges (yet), except by what he's written; He's a friend of Rebecca's. Yet reading his blog encouraged me and helped to remind me to stay focused on what's important, and to always, always keep the faith... even when it seems darkest. Thank you, Goerges (and thank you Rebecca for telling me to read his blog).