why do people like animals?

i'm thinking of getting bumper sticker i saw. it says, "i love animals... they're delicious"

now why would i be so heartless, you ask? i'll tell you why:

so i finally got my garden planted. i love gardening, and it takes me a lot of time to figure out my garden plot, select the plants and seeds and plant them all. then i cover every thing with mulch and baby everything along, waiting for results. now mulching takes awhile, especially when you have to rake it all up, and you have a large garden.

so, imagine my irritation when i discover that something has eaten my cabbage --my beautiful red cabbage that i was going to grow this year. going to grow, anyway. the other morning, i went to check on my garden, and where the cabbage had been, nothing but the bare, naked stalks were left.

was it a rabbit? one of our dogs? i don't know, but i seriously thought about setting out mouse traps by the veg, and then we'd soon discover the culprit. but i couldn't bear the thought of some poor rabbit hopping around with a broken foot, even though i did like my cabbage. but i bought rabbit wire and put it around the garden. then i thought i would check on the morning glories i had planted by my arbor... and found a nice big old mole hole instead of my flower. how rude was that? i mean, eat someone else's flowers, you stupid mole!!

oh, and someone (some animal that is) at my broccoli and cauliflaurer too. so everything is surrounded with rabbit wire at the moment. i don't think i'll make it into better homes and gardens this year. gee what a shame, i was so expecting that i would. (insert laugh here)

not all gardening woes are caused by animals, though...

i bought a stupid sprinkler from walmart, which promised to cover a wide area... and it barely covered a 6 ft radius. i think our dog covers a larger radius when she pees! well, anyway, after wrestling with the stupid thing and trying to get the garden watered, i gave up and bought another one at the local hardware store. i paid more for it, but it works. so i can't complain.

yet.

so this sprinkler has a phenominal spraying power. in fact, i got soaked from head to toe, trying to get it in the right place. every time i would try and move the stupid thing, it would spray me and get me soaked, no matter how hard i tried to time things.

but i must admit, once i got it in the right place, it did a great job of watering the garden (and everything else in the surrounding area).

so a few people drove by in that time... i'm sure i gave them a good laugh. imagine me, if you will, running around wearing my old grey fat pants that i wore when i was 9 mos preggers with clay. they are horribly stretched out, and just look awful. the pants are soaked, my sweatshirt is soaked, and my hair is dripping wet and plastered to my head. talk about making an impression.

i hope those plants appreciate it.