In which I break up a catfight and pay for it...

The dog, as usual, was chasing the cat round and round the house; the cat was mad and giving long siren like warnings to the dog. The dog only got more excited and more determined to catch the cat. His high pitched yippings and the cat's angry yowls were driving me mad, so I picked up the cat to rescue him. HE climbs on my shoulder and perches there gloatingly, swishing his tail tauntingly at the dog. The dog starts jumping on me. The cat decides that maybe my shoulders aren't high enough and attempts to perch on my head. This is too much. I take the cat and go to put him on the top of the armchair, only he doesn't want to get down. And he is fat and heavy, so he's hard to maneuver anyway. Because he's determined not to sit on chair, and I'm determined to get him off my head, we do this half compromise; I think he's on the chairback, and he thinks I'll give up and hold him. So when I let go, he does this mad struggle to get back in my arms and succeeds in digging a very sharp (and very long!) claw into my finger. He also scatters some papers that were lying somewhere in the process. I try to pick up the papers and get blood all over them.
So now, I'm walking about with a bloody finger, the cat is now hiding somewhere, and the dog is barking at the cat's hiding place; the hiding place is emitting angry warning signs. Mom is reorganizing the hall closet, where the bandaids are kept. So, I have to move all this stuff in front of the door, and finally get the bandaids.
I then realize that bandaids aren't made for people who have to do anything that involves water -- everytime you wash your hands, your band-aid becomes waterlogged, so that eventually, it resembles a miniature diaper wrapped around your finger.
The funny thing about all of this -- my cat is declawed in the front. So he has alot of talent. Perhaps it wasn't so much an attempt to stay in my arms; but more an attempt at revenge for putting him (as he would see it) in harms way. Hmmmmmm...
Are cats capable of devious thought? At this point, I'm rather unconcerned. It's the weekend, I know that I'm not capable of any more thought than a snail at this point. Way too tired, since I worked both jobs last night, finishing my new job at 7am, and then starting old job at 11am (also this wonderful morning). I did sleep in my truck for a couple of hours, so that helped. However I still need to find some coffee - somewhere.