patience... the much sought after holy grail...

it seems that whenever I TRY to be patient, everything happens at once and, like Indiana Jones, the quest is perilious and frought with danger... okay... well not danger for ME, but for those unfortunate enough to be the object of my loss, or lack of, patience. *sigh*

I watched the Passion the other day, and I'll speak more of that later, but after watching it, I thought of the suffering he willingly went through -- for us, and after seeing it -- was amazed at his love, and his forgiveness and pity for others. There was no anger, even towards the most brutal of his attackers.

And I decided to treat everyone with love and have kindness, and be kind even when people weren't kind to me.

Thus was my discovery, as I mentally reviewed my "progress" this weekend, was that I am still far from perfect, and quite the opposite. In fact, I don't know if you could call it progress, per se.... unless it is progress to realize you did not progress... yet.

First off, my cheerful mood was shattered when, after I made a rather innocent comment to a coworker, he took offense and my supervisor came and had a little chat with me. Apparently, you can't ask people if they had fun when they went out with a fellow co-worker, because it might be construed as an insinuation that said two people are dating and that is starting a rumor. Of course, I reacted quite well... not. Instead of having feelings of kindness toards this person, I indulged myself with feelings of self-pity let my irritation with this person grow.

Then, "Hidalgo" finally came out -- a movie about horses, and a mustang, no less -- and I went to see it with some friends. As luck would have it, we sat behind 3 tittering old ladies that talked in loud stage whispers throughout the whole movie, exclaiming over everyting, and ooohing and ahhing and speaking out in alarm when something bad was about to happen. If I hadn't been trying to hear the movie, perhaps it would have been funny. Or, perhaps, if I had had the right attitude all along, and hadn't been concentrating on just what I wanted, perhaps it wouldn't have bothered me at all.

Nick thinks I'm sweet, which amuses me profoundly, especially on days like that... because I was so tempted to turn around and say, "PLEASE BE QUIET!!!" Except... it wouldn't have been polite at all, and quite rude, said in the tone and mood I was feeling.

So they enjoyed the movie, and it was obvious to everyone in the theatre. But it really didn't ruin anything. And we all had a fun time. And I don't think Jesus would have yelled at someone in a theatre.

So... here we are, at the end of a week, and set to begin another one. Perhaps... just perhaps, I show a little more virtue by the end of the week. :P